for everyone's convenience, i thought i would like all of the posts entitled 'porn star' in one place:
porn star part 1
porn star part 2 (bathroom photo's and plato)
porn star part 3 (emergency room nights)
porn star part 4 (500 dollars)
porn star part 5 (white pill)
porn star part 6 (the e-mail)
porn star part 7 (and i know he watches over me)
part 8 (seeing jesus through a porn star)
i have so much that i have been thinking on since i wrote the series of posts about 'marie'.
comments have been steadily coming in, and my e-mail box is overflowing (thank god for gmail).
thank you for all of your kind words, challenging words, thoughtful, heartwrenching words. they have resonated deeply within me.
i wish i could have all the answers in this post... but i have much more to ponder.
i never knew that writing about a marie, would be almost as powerful as knowing her.
it has been amazing, that despite marie's death, despite a tragic ending to a beautiful woman,
she has continued to teach me great truths of jesus.
if i haven't gotten back to you, i'm getting there.... i want to be sure to take the time, and respond... and i am going to write more on some of the things that i have learned (regarding all of this, in the future, at some point, i promise)
i don't have many answers... i wish i did,
and perhaps that's why we need god, because we can't have all of the answers.
i'm learning, and all i have to offer is my story, and my journey...
thank you all of you, who have come here. may you find much peace in your day.
-natala-
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
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16 comments:
thanks for stopping by my blog. I hopped over to yours and I believe I will be here for quite a while. very soulfoul accounts. can't wait to learn more about Christ here as well.
Natala,
I can't wait to hear more of what you learned! This story has touched so many people!
Thank you again!
Natala,
I just wanted to remind you that for every person who leaves a comment on your site, there are perhaps hundreds more who are visiting and reading. Knowing that, I think you should be commended for being so transparent. I am blown away by your courage to share and your faith. Your sentiments express what so many of us are afraid to say about the church. Thanks for sharing it here.
I'm only two posts into your porn star stories, but this sentence jumped out at me...
"no one really understood why i was friends with her.
but really, i never understood why marie was friends with me."
Yes! I often think that only the Holy Spirit could lead a non-believer to hang out with a Christian. We can be so smug sometimes!
Thanks for these stories. Very inspiring. I'll be back to read the rest and I'll be posting a link to your site from mine as I can't say any of this any better myself. Thanks again.
Natala - I haven't left a comment before, but I realized I wanted you to let you know how incredibly powerfully your story spoke to me. Thank you for being willing to write with such honesty!
I look forward to hearing more of the lessons. You have already opened up many things for me to think about, and to write about.
Shalom
you've done a good thing here, natala.
natala, i am preaching this sunday on the samaritan woman at the well, and i think no one knew why jesus stopped and talked with her. she was even confused and perplexed...as i imagine both you and marie were as you encountered the face of god within each other and in the midst of your friendship...i think i might reference your post as a modern day parable;)
By sharing your struggle, and your experience strength and hope, you have enriched us all, sister. You won't find "the answers" to this experience, except in retrospect. But you've been a light in the darkness for many of us - and I, for one, am richer for having heard your story. Obviously, others feel the same way...
natala thank you so much for what you've shared, and for not having the answers.
its wonderful to share some big questions together.
"...I could easily erase all of my posts about the Beauty of God and On 'Making Converts' if I could only replace them with this story. As it is, poetic prose can bring to light things that other forms of writing can never do justice to.
It is a semi long story, but once you start you will have trouble putting it down. It is the story of a friendship with a porn star. Grab a cup of joe (or whatever your drink is) and partake on a rewarding journey. If I could beg you to read it I would..."
a place to muse
sorry...a place to muse
I came upon your stories about a Porn Star from another blog. I just sat crying. I'm going to print this out and let me youth read it. I'm seriously speechless...what a story, what a lesson, what an inspiration....
I came upon your stories about a Porn Star from another blog. I just sat crying. I'm going to print this out and let me youth read it. I'm seriously speechless...what a story, what a lesson, what an inspiration....
I came upon your stories about a Porn Star from another blog. I just sat crying. I'm going to print this out and let me youth read it. I'm seriously speechless...what a story, what a lesson, what an inspiration....
When someone asks questions, they find answers. This is my experience.
Answers have their own concept of time and may show up now, or an eternity from now.
They are great pranksters. Sometimes they only seem correct.
Ultimately, what you learn by asking questions about relationships tells you more about yourself than the other.
Any time you try and understand the complex thing that is love between living things, you should accept that there is no way to know for sure... but it's well worth the effort because it will open your heart and enrich the rest of your life and that of the people you share it with.
Thank you for being so candid with your experiences and thoughts!
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